Speeches: A Brothers Wedding Speech Example
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When my brother first told me
that I was going to do a reading at his wedding, I was
definitely happy. I was happy that I'd have the opportunity to
badmouth him in front of a large audience. So you can imagine
my disappointment when I sat down to write this, and I
couldn't think of any way to badmouth him effectively. It's
funny how your mind and memories can betray you when you
really need them the most. Of course, I can't stand up here
and say all sorts of good things about Mike... he is my
brother, after all. So I thought maybe I'd talk about
marriage, but then I realized, "how the heck am I gonna write
about marriage? I've never even been to a wedding before!" So
that brought me back to bad mouthing him, and though I could
stand up here and tell you about how a woman in Washington
D.C. once mistook Mike for a homeless guy and gave him $5. But
if I just related a string of incidents like that, while it
would be great to see Mike turning all sorts of shades of red,
it would be pretty boring. So instead of all that, I'm going
to read to you all a little story I wrote, just for this
A long time ago, in a galaxy far, far away, there lived a
little, well, we'll say it's a boy. His name was Axtabraxtalab...
but we'll call him Timmy. Now Timmy was a good little boy. He
never did anything bad, and never gave his parents anything to
punish him for. In fact, I suspect there was something wrong
with Timmy, mentally, for just that reason, but that's another
story. So anyway, one day, Timmy decided that he really wanted
a, well, let's call it a dog. So Timmy asked his parents if he
could get one.
"Mom, Dad, I've always been a good boy, and never given you
any reason to punish me. Would it be ok if I got a dog?"
His parents were shocked, because Timmy had never asked for
anything like that before... in fact, the most he'd ever
wanted from his parents was food and clothing, and that was
easy to provide. Obviously, they weren't mentally prepared for
"Umm... well... your mother and I will have to think about it.
I mean, owning a dog is a very big responsibility, you know"
his dad eventually answered.
"Oh I know, dad, I know. I promise I'll take good care of it;
I'll take it for a walk everyday, feed it everyday, and play
with it all the time" Timmy promised, the way kids have been
promising to do those same things since dogs were first
"Like I said, your mother and I need to discuss it first.
We'll tell you tomorrow morning. Besides, it's your bedtime
now. Good night, Timmy."
"G'nite dad, g'nite mom. See you in the morning." And without
any complaint, Timmy went to his room and went straight to
bed, without even taking a flashlight to bed with him so he
could read comic books.
The next morning, Timmy woke up really early, because he was
so eager to hear what his parents had to say. Unfortunately
for his parents, Timmy got up at 3:00 in the morning, long
before they awoke to get ready for work.
"Mom! Dad! Can I have the dog? Can I, can I?" he asked, like
the overeager 6-year-old he was.
"What time is it?" his father said, as he opened his eyes.
When he was finally able to find the clock in the dark and
focus on it, he cursed a blue streak.
"Ooo, daddy said a bad word... daddy's in trouble now!" Timmy
said, horrified at the string of semi-intelligible words
streaming from his father's mouth.
"Yeah, you can have a dog, all right? Now get out of here so I
can go back to sleep" his father said when he got over his
initial anger at being awoken so early in the morning.
Timmy was so excited, he wet his pajamas.
Later that day, after school was over, Timmy and his mother
went to the pet store to look for the right puppy for him. The
first puppy he saw was a little black puppy with big eyes, and
a short little nose. His ears were big and floppy, and his fur
was extremely thick and soft.
Timmy, bright boy that he was, decided against getting that
dog because he could tell that it would shed a lot, and make
his mother really mad at all the extra vacuuming she'd have to
The next two dogs weren't all that impressive to Timmy,
either. But the fourth dog he saw was exactly perfect... it
was a border collie long, silky fur, a white chest and
stomach, tan fur along most of her back and head, with darker
sections of fur on her head.
"Mommy, mommy! I want that one!" Timmy yelled, pointing at the
"Um, Timmy, mommy can't afford to buy you that one. How about
this nice mutt, over here? He seems nice."
"No mommy, I want this one. I don't like the rest. This one's
perfect!" Timmy screamed.
Not sure exactly how to handle the situation, Timmy's mom
thought quickly and immediately gave in. Timmy had never
thrown a tantrum before, so this must have been important to
him, she reasoned.
"Ok, we'll buy that one. What will you call her?"
"I'll call her Lassie. No wait, I think I'll call her Cuddles,
So Timmy's mom paid the pet store man for Cuddles, and she and
Timmy and Cuddles went on their way.
Now, anyone who's ever had a child who's promised to take care
of a dog knows that it never works out that way; that the
people who end up doing all the work are the kid's parents.
And, even though Timmy was the perfect child, he, too, fell
into the hole that all children do once they've gotten a dog.
He almost totally forgot about Cuddles, but worse than that,
at the pet store he'd learned that he could get anything he
wanted by screaming.
Well one day, Timmy was walking along the bank of the river in
the woods near his house. It was an unusually warm day for
early March, and Timmy decided to go for a swim. Unfortunately
for him, the warm weather had melted the snow up in the
mountains, and the river was flowing much faster than it
looked. When Timmy jumped in, the rapid current quickly swept
him away. Poor Timmy wasn't all that good of a swimmer since
he'd recently screamed his way out of swimming lessons, and it
was all he could do to keep his head above the water.
Right now, it looks bleak for poor Timmy, but luckily for him,
his father happened to be farther along the river walking
Cuddles. When little Timmy flashed by him and Cuddles, he was
so surprised he let go of Cuddles' leash.
Cuddles, being smarter than the average dog, quickly bounded
along the riverbank and was able to get ahead of Timmy.
Thinking quickly, she jumped in the water and doggy-paddled
her way across, trailing her leash behind. As Timmy was swept
by Cuddles, he was thrashing, reaching for anything to hold on
to, and his hand came upon the leash, and gripped it tightly.
Cuddles also happened to be an extremely strong swimmer, and
pulled Timmy across the raging river to the opposite shore.
Timmy's father quickly crossed the river via a bridge that was
nearby and grabbed his son and the dog and rushed them home.
"Young man, what were you thinking? You don't even know how to
swim!" his father berated him.
"I'm sorry, daddy... it was just so hot, and I was sweating,
so I decided to wade a little in the river. I'm sorry. Thank
you soo much, Cuddles, for saving my life." Timmy hugged the
soaked and exhausted dog, and vowed to actually follow through
on all the promises he'd originally made. It occurred to him,
precocious as he was, that if he'd been walking Cuddles like
he was supposed to, she would have kept him from jumping in
the river in the first place.
The moral of the story? I'd have to say the moral is something
like this: never give up on love, because love will never give
up on you. Mike and Jackie, congratulations.
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