The months before
the wedding are always fun. Besides the excitement of being newly engaged and the planning
and shopping, your friends and relatives will want to celebrate by honoring you with
dinners and parties. Enjoy yourself while it lasts, but try not to schedule too many
activities too close to the wedding. Show your appreciation with thank-you notes, or maybe
a little gift or flowers to your host or hostess.
Bachelor party
The bachelor party is very much a part of the wedding tradition. It is the groom's last
night out with the boys as a single man. However, the custom is optional and may be hosted
by the groom himself, his best man, or the ushers. The groom may also want to pass out his
attendants' gifts or review their duties and last minute plans.
It's not a bad idea to see to it that the party is a few days or a week before the
wedding. It traditionally starts with a dinner where the groom makes a champagne toast to
his bride. After drinking to the toast, each of the men would smash his glass so that it
could never be used for a less worthy purpose. The tradition is rarely carried to this
extreme, but the groom may still toast his bride.
Bridesmaid's Parties
Throughout the pre-wedding months, your bridesmaids will probably have entertained you and
been a big help with planning and shopping. It is a nice gesture for you to treat them to
either a traditional luncheon, afternoon tea, or even a dinner party including their
spouses or dates. Whichever you decide, it's a nice way to thank them, let them meet
out-of-town attendants, take care of final dress fittings, and go over last minute plans.
You may also decide to give them their gifts at that time.
Bridal Shower
The purpose of showers has always been to help outfit the couple's new home, or assemble
the bride's trousseau. As tradition has it, a close friend, the maid of honor, a relative
or a bridesmaid may give the bride a shower.
Theme showers are practical and very popular today. Also popular,
especially with older couples, are co-ed showers, which generally turn out to be just
another party, but with gifts and, possibly, games. When most of your friends are married,
it is nice to plan the party for a weekend evening. A theme is especially nice when there
is to be more than one shower. It can prevent duplicates.
Lingerie or Personal Showers: Gifts can include all the beautiful things
most people don't buy for themselves. They help prepare the trousseau for the honeymoon.
Gifts may include lacy nightgowns, camisoles, sexy underwear, bras, or a nice robe. Other
items may be perfume, bath accessories, or earrings.
Linen Showers: These showers are always useful. You may want to let
everyone know your color scheme. It can be helpful to register in a department store for
items such as monogrammed towels, a scale, bathroom sets, sheets, pillows or a blanket.
Kitchen Showers: This is a great shower, especially if it's co-ed. Browse
through any kitchen store or department store again; it would be helpful if you were to
register for items you need. One fun idea is to have each guest bring a favorite recipe
along with one item needed for its preparation.
Not everyone who is invited to the wedding need be invited to the shower. Guests are
usually close friends or relatives, or perhaps you may have one shower with each group.
Avoid any hurt feelings by only inviting people to the shower who are invited to the
reception, unless the wedding is taking place out of town, or only for close family
members. With all the excitement and passing of gifts, it's easy to misplace the cards.
Have someone write down what the gift was and who it was given by, as soon as it's opened.
Make sure to show your appreciation by sending a thank-you note immediately.
