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Site Admin Joined: 07 Jun 2002 Posts: 618

I don't want to have a reception necessarily. I was thinking I would have a casual sit down dinner at a local restaurant the night before with all the guest that want to come. The restaurant has a dance floor so we can make it a party. Is that appropriate or just lazy?

My fiance and my relationship with his immediate familiy is complicated.
Aside from one of his brothers, we do not get along! I haven't talked to them for a year. He just recently began to talk to them again after a huge arguement they had. We plan to invite them to the wedding and I don't know if it is a good idea. How can we handle the problem?

Site Admin Joined: 07 Jun 2002 Posts: 618

Today, you can do pretty much whatever you want to at a wedding as long as you keep it tasteful. What you are suggesting sounds like a rehearsal dinner, which is normally the responsibility of the groom and his family to
host and pay for. You don't mention how formal your wedding will be or how large, nor did you mention who would pay for the dinner the night before. If you are planning to have a small, informal wedding you can probably do what you are suggesting. If you are planning a more formal wedding,
however, and inviting guests who will not be invited the night before, you really should have a reception after the ceremony, even if it is only cake and punch served at the church. And it is your responsibility to pay for the dinner, not your guests.

Yes, you should invite your fiance's family to the wedding. Not to do so could create deep hurts that may take years to heal. Once you issue the invitation, its up to them to decide whether they will attend or not. In any case, you will have done the right thing.

Since there are family problems, his parents may not be willing to share in the costs of the rehearsal dinner if you have one. Therefore, you and your fiance will need to take that into consideration when budgeting expenses.

Good luck in your planning.

Glenna Tooman
Memory Makers Event Planning, LLC
http://www.memorable-events.com