Foreverwed.com ~ View topic

Joined: 28 Sep 2006 Posts: 1

what is the best way to handle this?
we are paying for the reception for the kids, not huge but very nice, what they both say they want. But his parents want to have a mini reception between the service and the reception where they want the wedding cake to be shared with the congragation. Cake is desert, after the meal. Am I going to get stuck with another bill? What do we do with the rest of the guests many of them from out of state? What about us (brides parents) do we go, do we stay....help

Site Admin Joined: 08 Jun 2002 Posts: 1174

Why are the groom's parents wanting to have a mini reception after the ceremony? Is it possible that you are inviting more people to the ceremony than you are inviting to the reception? If so, that is a breach of etiquette and the mini reception would be the way to handle the issue.

According to etiquette, anyone who is invited to the ceremony should also be invited to the reception. If you are unable to accommodate everyone, then the way to handle the situation is to have the "official" reception immediately following the ceremony. It is fine to serve only cake and punch. Everyone, including parents and all guests attend this reception. Then, later you can have what is called an after party where you serve a meal and have dancing. This party is for a smaller group of close friends, family, and the wedding party. By having the "official" reception and the later party, which is considered a separate event and should have a separate invitation, you fulfill your social obligation to all of your guests.