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Site Admin Joined: 07 Jun 2002 Posts: 618

My husband and I have been married for 3 1/2 years. We have recently been seperated but are building a stronger and better relationship through it. I am hoping that we will be together in the future, but if we do get back together I want to renew our vows like we're starting fresh. We never had a honeymoon either, so I would like to do that. Do you have any suggestions as to where I can get information on this. And, how do I tell him how I feel about all this without sounding silly? I just want it to feel like a new start. HELP!

Thanks

Posted on: 12:36 pm on Feb. 26, 2002

Site Admin Joined: 07 Jun 2002 Posts: 618

Hello Nikki,

Planning a vow renewal is an excellent way to commemerate your renewed relationship. A vow renewal ceremony is different from a wedding ceremony in several ways. First, since you are already married, you don't need a minister or judge to perform the ceremony; anyone can, so you might ask a father, grandfather, or special friend to do it.

Second, you don't exchange rings unless you are getting a new one, nor does your father give you in marriage, though he can walk you down the aisle.

You probably won't want to wear a traditional wedding gown, nor should you wear a veil. You can wear an evening gown, if you like, or you can have a more casual ceremony and wear anything that you want.

At your reception, you wouldn't do a bouquet or garter toss, though you might want to have a special dance together.

As for telling your husband, I would simply be honest with him and tell him you would like this to be a reminder of a new beginning in your lives. If most of your family or friends aren't aware of the problems that you have had, he might feel that he doesn't want to let them know. In that case, all they need to know is that you are renewing your vows. You don't need to bring up the past unless you both feel that it is appropriate to mention it.

Best wishes to you.

-----
Glenna Tooman, Wedding Expert, ForeverWed.com
Memory Makers Event Planning, LLC
http://www.memorable-events.com

Posted on: 2:33 pm on Mar. 5, 2002

Joined: 17 Aug 2002 Posts: 2 Location: Manchester, CT

Me and my DH were married this past May 11, 2002 and we are planning on renewing our vows on our 5th anniversary.

Good luck to all Wink

Site Admin Joined: 07 Jun 2002 Posts: 90

Hi, Laura, and welcome to the forum. Thanks for adding your comments.

I am always curious to know the reasons behind a couple deciding ahead of time to renew their vows on a certain anniversary--- especially at one so soon as the 5th. Renewals are becoming more and more common, and happening sooner and sooner after the wedding.

Can you share the reasons behind your plan? You're still so newly-wed, I would think that another ceremony would be far from your thoughts. Smile

Is the renewal planned to be a bigger celebration than the wedding or something like that?

Just wondering. Enjoy the forum!

Sara

Site Admin Joined: 07 Jun 2002 Posts: 90

Hello, dramamama--

Thanks for sharing your story. Your reasoning is the original (and best, IMO) reasoning for a renewal. When you are really starting anew with one another, and want to share that renewed commitment and determination with those dear to you--- and especially before God. I wish you all well as your family embarks on this re-focused life together.

In my mind, and most of my writings, I usually seperate the real vow renewal, like yours, from what I call a "public reaffirmation"--- that bigger ceremony shortly after a private wedding. Sometimes a reaffirmation is to please disappointed family and friends, sometimes it's to fullfill a couple's "wedding fantasies". It's a popular practice, and can be done well, if carefully planned. But it's certainly a different ceremony with a different focus than a traditional renewal.

By the way, Merry Christmas everyone!!!

Sara Very Happy

Site Admin Joined: 08 Jun 2002 Posts: 1174

You don't have to wait for a special anniversary to renew your vows, nor do you have to have a formal ceremony with guests. The two of you can have a private ceremony or you can have a public ceremony and a reception to follow. If you feel that the time is right for you, then that is the right time to do it.

Joined: 09 Sep 2006 Posts: 8 Location: Las Vegas,NV