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Site Admin Joined: 07 Jun 2002 Posts: 618

Is it ok for the bride to ask the bridesmaids to pay for the Matron of Honor's dress if she (matron of honor) can't afford the dress?
Also, what is the proper order for the bridesmaids to be arranged at the altar? Should it go in the order they were asked? Or by height?

Site Admin Joined: 07 Jun 2002 Posts: 618

Hello--

No, I think it would be quite rude to ask the other bridesmaids to pay for the matron's gown. If she cannot afford it, either the bride/her family should pay, or they should consider less expensive gowns.

Couples/families in *some* eras and social circles have taken the responsibility to pay for their maids' gowns and groomsmen's tuxes to make sure that the honor of standing up at the wedding doesn't become a financial burden. So if the other maids are already paying for their own gowns, that's more than enough to expect from them.

In the end, it should always be the responsibility of the couple and their families to cover any "extra" wedding expenses.

As for the order at the altar, some couples do arrange the maids/men so that they "match" eachother, and give the most even appearance (height, etc.)

Others arrange the attendants by their relationship to them-- the dearest, longest-known being placed nearest. For some couples, this is an obvious arrangement; for others, their friends and siblings have very equal relationships with them, so there's not a clear obvious order.

When the placement of multiple brothers or sisters has gotten tricky, I've seen numerous couples fall back on seniority as a deciding factor. The oldest sister, for instance, nearest the bride; younger sisters in order, thereafter.

Hope this helps, and good luck to you.

Sara Ambarian

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Foreverwed.com Expert--- Sara L. Ambarian
author/creative consultant/custom bridal designer
http://www.foreverwed.com/~sara