Mind Reading
submitted by marriagealive.org authors David
and Claudia Arp
"People who have lived together for a long time can
read each other's minds." Would you say this statement is true or false? It's true
that after twenty-six years of marriage we can often predict that the other will do or
say, but that's far from being a mind reader.
So let us dispense with the myth that partners can read
each other's minds. If we assume we can read each other's minds, we pave the way for
misunderstanding. Since we all continue to grow and change throughout life, only we know
what we're thinking.
Here's an action point for you: Really listen to each
other today. Don't assume you know what the other is thinking. Even at times when we
aren't mind reading, we may miss the real message. The next time you're not sure you
understand what your mate is saying, you could say something like, "Honey, this is
what I heard you saying… Am I right?" This gives the other person the chance to
confirm that you've got it right or to clarify the meaning.
So next time resist the urge to tell your mate what he or
she is thinking. Remember, most of us are poor mind readers. Besides, it's more fun to
listen, to ask questions, and to talk with one another.
article reprinted with permission, for copyright
information or to reprint this article please contact the authors directly at their
website. http://www.marriagebuilders.org
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