Children in the Wedding Q & A: Should I include children in my wedding


A guide on children in weddings would not be complete without the mention of including your own (or your fiancés or both of yours) children in your wedding. If one of you already have children, you may decide that you want to include them in your wedding. Many couples include them in the ceremony itself, and some couples include them in the vows.

 
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In our case, we used a re-written version of the Hands Ceremony as one way to include our children. While the ceremony little resembled the initial Hands Ceremony, we did keep the line mentioning "whose hands will hold our future children" with a few revisions. We simply stated, "Whose hands hold our children" and listed their names. This is merely one example of how a common ceremony reading can be converted to include your children. Another way we included our children was to have them stand with the wedding party (it was a purposely timed to be a short ceremony for this exact reason).

You can also have a special reading or event to include your children. If they are older (pre-teen and above), a unity candle ceremony might be appropriate. Have the couple light one candle and the child light the other candle. Once they are lit, both can light the middle candle together. The unity candle is a symbol of family unity and can be used in a variety of situations.

Another solution is the "family medallion". This is a necklace that has three intertwined circles on it. Each circle can represent a person (such as Bride, Groom and Child) or the circles can represent mixed families (the bride and her children, the groom and his children and adopted/step-children). Any combination of three will work with this type of unity device. The idea is that the family becomes united like the circles on the medallion.

A friend of mine invented what she called "The Kissing Ceremony". In this ceremony, the groom and bride said traditional vows then they said vows to the child. Instead of a ring, they sealed the vows with a kiss. The vows were along the lines of "With this kiss, I swear to love you unconditionally…to do my best to raise you correctly and to take care of you in sickness and health". It's a very moving ceremony that imbues a lot of emotion into the event.

Other parents wait till after the wedding is over in order to express the solemnity of the joining of the families. The joining of families is often commemorated with a gift or a heart-felt discussion. If the child is very young, a heirloom gift may be purchased. Be sure to engrave the date, the name of the couple and the child's (or children's) name on the gift to symbolize the joining of the family rather than just the bride and groom.

These are merely a few ideas that can be used to include your children as a part of your wedding and/or marriage
 
 

 


 

Choosing Your Bridal Party Q & A: What you need to know

Its our step by step guide to wedding to wedding attendants.  No matter the question, we've got an example or answer for you

The following information is articles, questions, and answers that have been submitted by ForeverWed readers.  Should these not answer your questions. Feel free to ask an expert.

 
 
Bridesmaids and Groomsmen, Getting to know one another
Choosing your bridal party
Can my bridesmaids wear black?
Dismissing a Bridesmaid or other attendant
Do we send invitations to the people in our wedding party?
Do you have a suggestion of a fun, inexpensive way to ask them to be in my
Down the aisle: Who walks with the bride?
Eight Tips for Drafting a Great Team!
Fun and unique ways to ask my friends to be by my side in my wedding
Gift Ideas for your wedding attendants
Is it a new tradition to have a maid of honor and matron of honor?
Is it appropriate to have my divorced dad & mom walk me down the isle
Is it tacky to have a MAID & MATRON of honor?
Is there a certain way your supposed to ask a person to be an attendant?
Matron of Honor and a Maid of Honor
more than one maid of honor?
Not the Maid of Honor, can I help?
order of processional
what color ties should the guys wear?

When should I ask them to be my attendants? 

Best man: Best Man Responsibilities
Best man: Duties of the Best man and Maid of Honor
Best man: How to choose your best man
Best man: The Morning of duties..
Best man: You've Been Chosen to be the Best man, Now Live up to it!
Best man: wedding duties for the night before
Best man: Writing that wedding speech
Best man: Forum: How soon should we order the tuxedos
Best man: Speech: Examples:  We have over 40 speeches
Children: Including Your Children
Children: Should you include them?
Children: Roles For Children in Weddings
Children: Ten tips on children participation  in Weddings
Children: Deciding on clothing
Children: Gift Ideas for children in Weddings
Children: Make your children a part of the wedding
Children: Ring Ceremony for Baby
Children: Vows that include children
Children: Including a 2 year old in the vows and ceremony
Children: Including Babies in the Ceremony
Children: Ceremony to include children
Children: Child Attendants with sitter after ceremony?
Children: How to include step children in vows
Children: Kids In The Wedding Party….Will They Be In Yours?
Children: Child care will be provided during the ceremony
Children: Who buys the pillow?
Duties: 10 Things Your Ushers Should Know
Duties: Best man Responsibilities
Duties: Do you know your duties? Check this list for your duties!
Duties: For a 4 year old daughter
Duties: Is it proper to have a maid and a matron of honor?
Duties: It is traditional for the bride to treat her maids to a luncheon
Duties: Duties of the Bestman and Maid of Honor
Duties: Maid of Honor Duties
Duties: What are the grooms parents suppose to pay for?
Duties: What exactly does a personal attendant to do?
Maid of Honor : Being the Maid of Honor
  Maid of Honor: Ordering Dresses
  Maid of Honor: Planning the Wedding Shower
  Maid of Honor (MOH): Planning the Bachelorette Party
  MOH: Tending to the Bride on the Big Day
  MOH: Advice: Can I have a maid of honor and matron of honor?
  MOH: Advice: How much money should I expect to be spending on this?
  MOH: Advice: I have been asked to be Matron of Honor, there is also a Maid of Honor.  Please advise me as to the logistics in the processional/recessional order for the both of us
  MOH: Advice: Long Distance Maid of Honor
  MOH: Advice: WHO COULD BE A MAID OF HONOR?  ALSO, HOW MANY MAID OF HONOR COULD YOU HAVE AT YOUR WEDDING?
  MOH: Advice: Is there a kosher way of letting her down? if I agree to follow through, while letting her know my concerns both financially and time commitment wise, is there an etiquette in letting others (friends, family, bridal party, etc.) know that I will NOT be paying for everything
  MOH: Advice: What do you call a guy that stands in as your maid of honor?
  MOH: Advice: maid of honor and also another friend as the matron of honor. one standing on each side.
  MOH: Advice: my best friend is getting married and has asked me to be her maid of honor, what can I wear and what are all my duties?
  MOH: Advice: I am matron of honor, I would like to give a very nice speech instead of making no sense and embarrassing my self
  MOH: Advice: Do you have any suggestions on poems, verses, jokes, etc. that would help me start and end this speech? 
  MOH: Advice: I haven't told my maid of honor that I want her to be the maid of honor yet. I really want to give her a book on being a maid of honor and how I think she is so very special.
  MOH: Advice: Mother as matron of honor
  MOH: Advice: My cousin is getting married and I am her maid of honor. What exactly am I expected to do for the wedding
  MOH: Advice: We are having 3 bridesmaids and do not want to select one as a maid of honor. Is there such a role as personal attendant who could fulfill some of the maid of honor duties?
 


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