Bridal Showers: Q & A: Victorian Bridal Shower Tea Time Help

Q. I am the maid of honor and I am throwing the Bride a  bachelorette/shower party.  Kind of a lingerie party as well.  The problem is that her as well as all of the guest invited (app. 10) are Christians, including me and I can only find pretty distasteful games and party favors.  I want it to be fun and have a little bit of embarrassing stuff in it, but I also want it tasteful and not offending and the bride is pretty easy to embarrass.  We are kind of going with a Victorian, tea-time, lingerie theme right now.  Do you know of any help or resource I can get for the kind of party I need to plan?

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A. I applaud your desire to keep things tasteful rather than tacky.  (Lewd or suggestive parties are one of my soap box issues.  They usually cause fights between the bride and groom and married guests.) 
Having a Victorian-style tea is perfect for a shower.  Ask the guests to wear hats and boas, if they have them.  Use linens on the tables and real dishes (no paper or plastic).  If you don't have access to a number of tea cups, ask each guest to bring her favorite cup.  At the party, you can have each person show her cup and tell why it is her favorite.  In place of a game, you can have a hat contest for prettiest, oldest, funniest, etc.
Serve small tea sandwiches filled with things like chicken salad or cream cheese or serve open-faced sandwiches. (Make large sandwiches, remove the crusts, and then cut in 1/4ths or cut with a round cookie cutter.).  Also serve small individual cookies or bite-sized desserts, and of course tea.  Offer several flavors of tea.  By doing this, the tea party can actually replace a game. 
Do you, the bride, or any of the guests enjoy cooking?  A fun game to play is to go through the kitchen and place small amounts of white substances in individual little cups. You can buy small nut cups at the grocery store for this.  Be sure to number each one. Then, pass them around and have each person write down what they think it is (no tasting or touching, but smelling is okay).  You should be able to easily find in any kitchen:  flour, sugar, salt, baking soda, baking powder, powdered milk, and powdered sugar.  Add any other white items that the person might have or that you can borrow from a neighbor's kitchen, like powdered coffee creamer, cream of tartar and biscuit mix.
For favors, how about making your own?  They don't have to be expensive.  You can give each guest an assortment of tea bags.  Place them in small bags (you can get clear cellophane bags at craft stores) and place a label on each with the bride's name and wedding date.  You might also find individual tea infuser spoons or other low cost items that you can use either for favors or for prizes.
You can begin with the tea party and the hat contest, then a game, then opening of the gifts.  If you want to have more food, such as a special cake, serve it last.
It should be a lovely party that the bride will remember for years to come.  Be sure to bring a camera.

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