Wedding Party Q & A: How to choose your bridal attendants


Determining you bridal party is one of the most harrowing decisions you will make while planning your wedding. You first must determine the number of attendants then fill these slots with your friends and family. Let us just say this, "You are going to make a mistake, some feelings between friends and family will be hurt, but stand by your decision." Your first decisions are generally the best, go with these instincts.

 
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Here are a few pointers to help you on your way. Start by eyeing the size of your ceremony site. Many sites just may not accommodate a large bridal party. It may be physically impossible to place more than 6 attendants at smaller venues. You must remember that certain fixtures at the ceremony site are "fixed", that is they cannot be moved to accommodate more attendants.

Choose your attendants very carefully, you must be sure that they will still be close to you at the time of your wedding. This may rule out some of your business colleagues, especially if you are considering a career move. Remember that many friends may be unwilling to travel a great distance to your ceremony. There will be some pressure to place members of your family in the bridal party. Make sure that you are certain of these choices before yielding to the family. Childhood friends may have become too distant, to choose. Your wedding also symbolizes your future, so pick some attendants who you will cherish as time passes.

If you find it difficult to tell an anxious friend or loved family member on your decision not to include them, you will find it easier to break this news to them either in person or by letter. People have become too used to phone calls, so will respond more positively to your use of another way to tell them. Try to keep your selections a closely guarded secret, so you have the opportunity to tell these disappointed people before they hear through the grapevine. It is always easier to explain to the other party on your problems in choosing your bridal party, and telling them the truth about having to decide between friends, family, cost and size of the bridal party.

The selection of a bridal party also gives you some more power in concluding other facets of your wedding. For instance, if your sister-in-law must be included in the party, and you compromise on a friend, then stand fast on another decision, such as if you want the wedding in a certain location and your mother-in-law wants it in another. Remember that your wedding, as well as your life is full of compromises and pick and choose yours wisely. Just make sure that you can live with these decisions, as long as you feel as your wedding is still under control.



 

Choosing Your Bridal Party Q & A: What you need to know

Its our step by step guide to wedding to wedding attendants.  No matter the question, we've got an example or answer for you

The following information is articles, questions, and answers that have been submitted by ForeverWed readers.  Should these not answer your questions. Feel free to ask an expert
.

 
 
Bridesmaids and Groomsmen, Getting to know one another
Choosing your bridal party
Can my bridesmaids wear black?
Dismissing a Bridesmaid or other attendant
Do we send invitations to the people in our wedding party?
Do you have a suggestion of a fun, inexpensive way to ask them to be in my
Down the aisle: Who walks with the bride?
Eight Tips for Drafting a Great Team!
Fun and unique ways to ask my friends to be by my side in my wedding
Gift Ideas for your wedding attendants
Is it a new tradition to have a maid of honor and matron of honor?
Is it appropriate to have my divorced dad & mom walk me down the isle
Is it tacky to have a MAID & MATRON of honor?
Is there a certain way your supposed to ask a person to be an attendant?
Matron of Honor and a Maid of Honor
more than one maid of honor?
Not the Maid of Honor, can I help?
order of processional
what color ties should the guys wear?

When should I ask them to be my attendants? 

Best man: Best Man Responsibilities
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Duties: For a 4 year old daughter
Duties: Is it proper to have a maid and a matron of honor?
Duties: It is traditional for the bride to treat her maids to a luncheon
Duties: Duties of the Bestman and Maid of Honor
Duties: Maid of Honor Duties
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Duties: What exactly does a personal attendant to do?
Maid of Honor : Being the Maid of Honor
  Maid of Honor: Ordering Dresses
  Maid of Honor: Planning the Wedding Shower
  Maid of Honor (MOH): Planning the Bachelorette Party
  MOH: Tending to the Bride on the Big Day
  MOH: Advice: Can I have a maid of honor and matron of honor?
  MOH: Advice: How much money should I expect to be spending on this?
  MOH: Advice: I have been asked to be Matron of Honor, there is also a Maid of Honor.  Please advise me as to the logistics in the processional/recessional order for the both of us
  MOH: Advice: Long Distance Maid of Honor
  MOH: Advice: WHO COULD BE A MAID OF HONOR?  ALSO, HOW MANY MAID OF HONOR COULD YOU HAVE AT YOUR WEDDING?
  MOH: Advice: Is there a kosher way of letting her down? if I agree to follow through, while letting her know my concerns both financially and time commitment wise, is there an etiquette in letting others (friends, family, bridal party, etc.) know that I will NOT be paying for everything
  MOH: Advice: What do you call a guy that stands in as your maid of honor?
  MOH: Advice: maid of honor and also another friend as the matron of honor. one standing on each side.
  MOH: Advice: my best friend is getting married and has asked me to be her maid of honor, what can I wear and what are all my duties?
  MOH: Advice: I am matron of honor, I would like to give a very nice speech instead of making no sense and embarrassing my self
  MOH: Advice: Do you have any suggestions on poems, verses, jokes, etc. that would help me start and end this speech? 
  MOH: Advice: I haven't told my maid of honor that I want her to be the maid of honor yet. I really want to give her a book on being a maid of honor and how I think she is so very special.
  MOH: Advice: Mother as matron of honor
  MOH: Advice: My cousin is getting married and I am her maid of honor. What exactly am I expected to do for the wedding
  MOH: Advice: We are having 3 bridesmaids and do not want to select one as a maid of honor. Is there such a role as personal attendant who could fulfill some of the maid of honor duties?
 


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